Jane Smith’s Translation Dictionary

Entries include …
Bitch!
1. Waa-aa-ah!
Don’t be so sensitive.
1. I want to believe that my actions have no effect whatsoever on anyone.
2. Don’t reveal by comparison what a dull-headed emotionally-challenged thug I am.
I don’t want to argue with you.
1. I don’t want to discover that my opinion on this matter is indefensible. 
It was just a joke.
1. I don’t want to be held responsible for it.
2. I didn’t think it through. 
And many, many more …

Jane Smith is a character in my novel A Philosopher, a Psychologist, and an Extraterrestrial Walk into a Chocolate Bar.  And she started this dictionary. I’ve continued it. And everyone else is supposed to finish it. Well, add to it. (It’s unlikely it’ll ever be finished.) Send additions – new definitions to the entries already listed and/or completely new entries – for future editions to me.   (Additionally, you can add your entries to the tumblr page I set up, hoping it would become viral like “Everyday Sexism” and “Why I’m a Feminist” and #MeToo.  Sadly, it did not.)

Jane also started a list titled “And here’s something else that would never happen to a man …” – which I include at the end of the dictionary (it’s also in Sexist Shit that Pisses Me Off, 2e). I created a tumblr page for this as well, similarly hoping it would become viral, but, similarly, it did not. Pity. (But it’s not too late! Add your additions to the page and send them to me for future editions of the Dictionary.)

Magenta 2022

Given its length and the hoped-for-often updating with additions, this one’s not available in print. 

It IS available, however, in various e-formats (Kindle, Kobo, NookBook, iBook), but if you’re content with epub or pdf, you can download it right here!  For free! 

(And please note that you can still leave a rating and/or review on Amazon as long as you’ve purchased at least $50 worth of stuff from Amazon in the past year; just be sure to state that you received the book directly from the author. Ratings and reviews are important because the Amazon algorithm limits search results to exact title/author until a book has 25 ratings/reviews and doesn’t include a book in ‘similar to’ results until it has 50 ratings/reviews. Which means that known books become even more known, and otherwise good books remain unknown. Sigh.)

(And/or without any Amazon involvement, you can spread the word by posting on Goodreads, LibraryThing, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, and other social media platforms.) (For which I say, ‘Thank you!’) (And please let me know so I can repost your review there!)

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“Oooh, awesome!”  C. Osborne, who read A Philosopher … Chocolate Bar and loved it